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ltgmars
DONEDONEDONEFOREVER with my thesis and presentation. Feels so good, unf.
The translucent arrow stickies I used in the main text, Watashi, Danshikou Shusshin Desu. The creatures I used in Confessions of a Mask and Yes Yes Yes. The purple ones I used in The Changelings.
Will be returning piles of thesis books to the library soon. Tonight, even? Now, perhaps.
Now that this is done, I can worry about all of the other things I have to do. Oh, college, you cad.
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:38 (UTC)Btw, the creature stickies are sooo cute.
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:46 (UTC)The creature stickies were actually a little present from a friend of mine. It felt like a shame to use them, but they did make research that much more enjoyable.
Also! We have not talked in quite some time. I see that you, too, are busy with school and that thing called "the future" on the other end of it. Let's work hard together, yeah? ♥
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Date: 2010-02-16 02:42 (UTC)But yeah it's been too long! Thank god for lj letting people keep touch even through intervals of crazy workloads! Ahhh the future. Hissss stay awayyy.
But yeah, let's work very hard! <3 Good luck!!
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:44 (UTC)that typo-ridden thing?I KID <3 <3(smooch) i am so proud of you!
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:48 (UTC)Also, I was pathetic and sent my professors a new copy, without the typo I found. And now that I'm never reading that thing ever again, I can live in ignorant bliss, pretending that no other typos exist.
♥ ♥ ♥
Also, tell me what you think when you're done. It's not ground-breaking or anything, but you're basically the first person I've let read my academic work besides required peer editing. Also, tell me if I'm turning into a privileged white male theorist (on whose ideas I admittedly heavily rely), because no one wants that. ._.
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:52 (UTC)i'mma read it tomorrow. i was restless/ bad state last night (ahahaha NO KIDDING, RIGHT?), but i'm feeling better, thanks to you :0 i'm so honoured you're letting me peruse it, hotdoggie. i'll tell you my honest feelings, but i know it's fabulous already ♥
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:54 (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-01 02:57 (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-01 03:03 (UTC)next time you need to feel better about yourself, take a look at you-know-who's d-list talent agency. http://www.flip-up.jp/flipup/02.members/members.html . . . his glamour shots are too much.
it's my birthday month! here's a drabble.
Date: 2010-02-01 04:02 (UTC)-------
"This song is immensely catchy," he notes before downing another sip of brandy.
"Yeah. I like the background loop - very bossa nova. Not something I would write, though." I notice he's drinking already; it's one o'clock in the afternoon. "Or that'd you'd like."
"Or play." He sets the glass down and loosens his tie. "Although you do have the falsetto for it."
"Are you calling me annoying?" I uncross my legs and sit up, contemplating the merits of going to the piano. "I'm widely loved and have many accolades for my personality."
"Ah." A pregnant pause; neither of us have the heart for teasing, so that goes unpursued. "Play us something," he mumbles. "One of your songs." He's back in the chair completely, sleepy and smouldering. "Perhaps Clocks or something."
"Cunt." I wonder idly what time she'll be expecting me at home. Not that it matters. "Just a wino and the piano man," I mumble under my breath as I take a seat at the instrument.
"What? You know, Ninomiya-kun, you know you have a bloody thing for Coldplay or you wouldn't sound as you do. You're always covering these soppy ballads; downright weepy, you are. I'd avoid soy if I were you," he grins - I'd describe it as a rakish grin - "you've enough estrogen, as it is."
I ignore his blasphemy and play a few bars. "Would you ever be my, would you be my fucking boyfriend?" I croon, presenting a grin of my own. "Kaname-san?" Batting my lashes behind spectacles is a futile exercise, but I engage in it anyway.
"Sure, but you're on bottom." His eyes meet mine so intensely that I'm thrown off for a moment.
"Well, you are older," I argue, playing it up as if seriously considering this, but still unable to meet his eyes. "So maybe you're right. And I am smaller, as well," I observe, trying to get under his skin. He's a fanatic about his weight.
"Fuck you! I'm incredibly thin," he hisses. His predictable vanity is charming in its earnesty.
"Yes, yes, sorry. You're anorexic. I just meant shorter." He sighs heavily and looks down at himself, appropriately chastised. I continue, "But I don't know how much I'd like a cock invading my privacy like that."
"You'd like it. You'd moan - those big, loud, open-mouthed gasping groans. He did that. My ex, I mean. You look like my ex. Less pretty, but similar." He starts to wriggle out of the depths of the chair and I look away again, focusing on controlling my blush, and studying the familiar ivory keys until I feel him settle beside me on the bench. I glance at him sideward, but I don't say anything. "It's never gonna work, I don't know what I'm doing here," he sings quietly and plays sloppily. I turn my face toward him fully.
"Do you know 'Chopsticks'?" There's an unceremonious clatter of keys.
He looks at me, deadpan. I keep my face straight, and continue. "I'm requesting it. It's my favourite." He starts laughing and shaking his head.
"You're hard to seduce."
"You're drunk."
"I'm always drunk."
"A bottle of red," I begin, happiness tugging at the corners of my conciousness. I want to tell him that I'm much easier than he's playing for, but I haven't the heart. If he wants to think he's ensnaring a straight boy, I'll let him.
"A bottle of white," his voice is clear and chipper, if his countenance is unsmiling. His long, slender fingers move with ease, stretching the range of keys and gingerly pecking the right ones.
I move my fingers toward his own, and gently brush them away. "A - how does the rest of it go?" I whisper, poised to play.
I can't hear his chuckle, but I can feel the vibration of the nearly-silent sound - I don't remember moving nearer to him. "Stay with me into the night?" he coos in his velvetly baritone, and I sigh, not quite laughter, and play a few improvised bars.
He hums happily along with my unprectible composition, and I don't pause when I feel his lips on my neck. I think we're both hoping that he is sober enough to understand my answer.
YEAH GIRL piano sex. PIANO SEX FOR YOU*!!
* note: sex sold separately.
Re: it's my birthday month! here's a drabble.
Date: 2010-02-01 04:35 (UTC)I love your Nino. I've always loved your Nino. He's so... I dunno. Deliberate? But at the same time he's really earnest in his reactions, and even shy. You show that juxtaposition very nicely in your writing.
AND. Can I say that I want to see more first-person writing from you? I tend not to like it on principle, I think, because in my mind there's something pompous about thinking you know a character so well that you can write as him. (Probably I'm bitter and projecting, because I'm really afraid of trying first-person prose.) But you capture Nino really nicely here, and Nino's reactions and emotions. It's not even Cami-writing-as-Nino. It's... Nino. You know?
(This is why you never ask for feedback from me. It's because I never know what to say and it doesn't make any sense. But I loved it. Thank you.)
Hap-happy birthday month, my dear. We can try that collab sometime, if you'd like. ♥ But be warned that I'm an awfully trite and gimmicky writer. The bestficever!collab we wrote when you were visiting isn't going to be too far from how it actually is working with me.
Re: it's my birthday month! here's a drabble.
Date: 2010-02-01 04:57 (UTC)ugh, reading this monograph for class, but i wanted to post all of the songs referenced in the drabble :D just because i like them so:
i'm sure nino would at least be able to play the last one ;)
<3
edit: fixed youtube links :0
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:45 (UTC)I have to go to my carrel at some point and pull out all my tabs. >.> I made confetti with all the tabs from my history thesis.
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Date: 2010-02-01 02:50 (UTC)Confetti! That sounds delightful. It's like the confetti that the Fed makes with out-of-circulation bills. You can buy packs of it somewhere and throw shredded money into the air... how fabulous.
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Date: 2010-02-01 03:19 (UTC)...I feel like a n00b but I keep seeing the word "cad/caddy". tell me what it means? ;__;
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Date: 2010-02-01 03:45 (UTC)I love those things. I buy them whenever I go to Staples (which is inhumanly frequently, to be honest).
cad (http://www.google.com/dictionary?aq=f&langpair=en|en&hl=en&q=cad) via Google dictionary. Just look a word up in google and click on the link it gives you in the bar before all of the search results. It makes looking up words (and synonyms) so much easier. ♥
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Date: 2010-02-01 03:26 (UTC)no subject
Date: 2010-02-01 03:46 (UTC)And oh man, I'm going to have to try that with my next major paper (keep the drafts, that is). That sounds incredible. And I'm a pyromaniac, so... :3
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Date: 2010-02-01 03:42 (UTC)Second, JEALOUS >.<
Third, SKIRRED. Right now I feel like I don't have enough brain power for a thesis, not that it's coming soon anyway xp
What kind of job are you looking for? Or do you already have one waiting after you grad?
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Date: 2010-02-01 03:49 (UTC)*breathes on fingernails, polishes them against her shirt, and admires them, like a jerk*
GIRL. It was actually easier than expected for me. Once you get a topic you're really interested in, the research isn't terrible, and the writing ends up being pretty fun. Or maybe I'm anomalous.
I'm hoping for grad school next year. I've applied to a few places, but I kind of have my doubts that I'll get into any of them because I'm such a mediocre student. So most likely I'll be living at home with my parents, working at Starbucks. (And there's nothing wrong with that! Starbucks is great. Consumerism, woooooo!)
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Date: 2010-02-01 04:06 (UTC)Wow grad school huh, I never even think that far o__O Well then good luck to you! I've always wanted to work at Starbucks!! I just don't think I'll survive the super early shift xp
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Date: 2010-02-02 03:01 (UTC)the second episode airs tonight :0 i'm so eager!!
http://www.megavideo.com/?v=B2O40WPL
i've written some more (wut, my weeks are usually leisurely). if you have an idea for what you'd like to write, please do tell, and i'll work on my part first, as i am a loser and have more free time than you :D get it while it's hot, i'm inspired =~=
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Date: 2010-02-02 03:19 (UTC)I have... no ideas. I'm bad with ideas. You come up with something? :D?
part 1
Date: 2010-02-02 03:57 (UTC)i do feel uneasy writing celebrities in first person, but i'm not opposed to it, as you seem to nearly be, so <3 here it is.
A lot of things have been happening lately, but, really, this is too much.
He needs to realize, thoroughly, that he is now an increasingly famous man. I know this is not an easy concept to grasp hold of, as he was plucked off the street and put onto the screen in a matter of months, but it's been two years since then. He's actually doing quite well with the interviews and the inane questions that the faux-journalists regurgitate - in fact, his poker face has been winning every round of public opinion. He's acting appropriately 'aw shucks, I'm just a country boy,' and very humbled and honoured. He even totes out the 'off-the-cuff' anecdotes
(Well, I was just there bowling with my friends when this guy approaches me and tells me I'm handsome - normally, that is a scary situation!)
every so often.
Kaname hasn't offended anyone; he skillfully skims over the rare 'touchy' subject, heaping smiles like rice over messy stew - great, he's a peach. Everyone is really keen on him and he nods and bows and flicks his hair and covers his mouth like a goddamn woman when he laughs.
Then there's this.
I have to keep my temper with him - my nature teeters on a hot handle that I often fly off of. And when that happens, everything gets overly melodramatic, and it's been a long, long day and I can't deal with that sort of emotional over-stimulation. My wit isn't one-tenth near its pinnacle, and even a lightweight like Kaname may be able to crush me.
Therefore, I approach the bed with measured steps, visualizing calm in my mind. I stop a foot from the edge of the bed and clear my throat,
"Kaname-kun, I swear to god I will kill you if you keep trying to sabotage me like this."
A petite blond perks up, burrowing out of the creamy linen like a pretty cockroach, and proceeds to act exceedingly shocked.
"Oh my god! Oh my god!" he puts a hand over his mouth, bare, thin shoulders folding to his neck, "Yaida-san! I cannot believe it's you! Oh, are you surprised that I know who you are? Oh my god," the pinkness emanating from his cheeks is threatening to spill over into my reality. I back away a bit.
He continues, "I'm an actor as well, and you - you're a star maker, huh? I've seen you in Nagoya for auditions and I never got the chance to read for you, but -"he stops abruptly and it's a little unnerving.
I can't help but feel mildly disturbed by this enthusiastic little human. "That's nice. Goodbye."
His big, toothy smile disappears. He looks scandalized. "Excuse me?"
"Ciao!" I gesture toward the door, giving him my best smile, although his eyes are so narrow now that I doubt he can see out of them. I wait, patiently, as he redresses and mumbles what are no doubt curses on and insults against my being. After, I suppose, he is satisfied with the amount of huff he's made, he storms out of the room.
I don't say anything for a full minute, and focus wearily, amusement fast fading, on the large mass beneath the luxuriant comforters.
"Look at me," I finally say, testy because he hasn't once acknowledged my presence whatsoever - back to me. "I know you're not asleep. I am not a complete idiot, although I doubt myself more and more every day." I pause and give him a moment to agree with me.
[continued in part 2!]
part 2!
Date: 2010-02-02 04:06 (UTC)"I know what you're going to tell me. ‘You're being so irresponsible. He could go tell the papers. I can't believe you're so selfish. You need to stop acting so juvenile. Do you know how famous you are? Keep it in your pants or I swear to god I'll fire you and ruin your career and your life.’" he finishes his mimicry of me. My voice is not that high; in fact, I doubt I could reach that octave even if I were kicked very hard. I try my best to regard his (still-turned) back with a blasé expression.
He continues, "It's very charming, but I'm not in the mood. Let me reply to that with my usual closing bit, 'Oh, okay, Yaida-san. I'm sorry. I just can't seem to help myself. I'm sorry, please don't drop me. I know he won't say anything about it.'" He turns to face me, finally, and - infuriatingly - he's smiling, because this is apparently a hilarious situation. "And, now, to finish as usual, you can do me."
The curve of his lips is maddening.
"I knew I should have kept Eita on." Somehow, I'm not as angry as I was a moment ago, although this is indeed a very serious situation. I avert my gaze from his face. "Because, you see, he too, I hear, is promiscuous, but he's straight, and when a man has a string of illicit affairs with women, he's a 'bad boy,' a tabloid darling. He's Colin Farrell, yeah?"
I take a deep breath and force my eyes back to his. His brow his cocked and he's propped up, resting his chin in his hands. Mocking me with his body language, even. I ignore it. "When a man who is straight and in a 'serious' relationship has a string of illicit affairs with other women, he's an asshole. He's Charlie Sheen."
He is trying not to laugh, I can tell, because he's wrinkling his nose in this cute way, and it's fucking disastrous for the serious tone of my monologue, but I soldier on. “When a supposedly straight man, who is tantalizingly available to the female public has loads of sex with men and is caught, well - "
"Well, then he's just a fag - and not a fun one, either."
I hate it when he finishes my sentences. He sits up in bed, way too at ease with the whole situation. His hair is messy and his smile is seductive, and he's glowing and, frankly, beautiful. I roll my eyes, but I don't speak, because I know, if I try, it will come out - well, it won't come out at all, that's the thing. He's on the edge of the bed now, long, lean legs over the side, feet hovering inches from the floor. "You should think of a new monologue to scold me with, Yaida-san. That one was lethally stern the first time, but now it's sort of comical."
"Sort of comical," I mock his voice as nastily as I can muster in the face of overwhelming sex appeal.
"Would you really rather have Etia as your client?" His tone is suddenly soft and insincere. I refuse to look at him, and instead steadily continue on my slow path toward a point.
[con't part 3!]
final part!
Date: 2010-02-02 04:06 (UTC)I pause and stare the so, you know every agent in the world? joke right out of him before going on. "But I - well, I have you, whom I have to babysit to make sure you're not banging security and whoever's, you know, around. One of these days, your little 'quaint rice paddy' facade it going to wear through and people will see that you're just another nymphomaniacal Tokyo boy."
I'm quite pleased with how I handled that. Unfortunately, Kaname, too, looks pleased.
"Mmm, that's not true," he sing-songs, "I'm not nymphomaniacal. I just give the fans what they want." He sets his feet on the floor, his bottom still on the edge of the bed. In that position, I can't help but think that he looks like some sort of giant cat, ready to pounce on me and force me to give in to screwing him, incriminating myself. I step out of his line of prey.
"I'm your fan," I state as plainly as I can. Then, in a tiny, feminine voice, "Oh, Kaname-san, I'm your biggest fan! You know what would really please me?" He laughs and stands completely, one hand on his hip, the other relaxed by his side, watching me. I clasp my hands and place them over my heart in what I suppose is a feminine gesture of beseeching, "For you to keep it in your pants and not risk tarnishing my reputation!"
I'm much smaller than he is, and for a moment I feel like falling to my knees and letting him overwhelm me, but he chuckles and gently shoves me a bit. "It’s all about you, huh? But, alright, I'll try to do better for my biggest fan."
He walks past me, into the bathroom, and throws a completely unnecessary look over his shoulder before closing the door.
I let out a sigh of relief, conveniently forgetting that I've accomplished nothing, really. Except getting a semi hard-on and enough stress to take six more months off of my life.
[end]
:D comments and critiques, please. i am trying to write in a more 'normal', less stilted manner. i feel like this is almost . . . shitty 14 year old style fan fiction, because i'm so out of my league, but :Dv
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Date: 2010-02-05 18:34 (UTC)(I still haven't read your fics yet, but I'm hoping to do so (and to call you) tonight. ♥)
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Date: 2010-02-05 18:47 (UTC)i shall learn to read japanese JUST TO READ THESE COMIC.
edit: NEW ICON NEW ICON NEW ICON
i also made an el jay entry about nakanai for you :0
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Date: 2010-02-07 23:08 (UTC)<3
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Date: 2010-02-09 04:03 (UTC)maybe you could stay here for spring break? i mean, i do not have a car, and it won't be ~*~excitement filled~*~ but we will save a lot of money, you can meet bonnie, i can teach you how to cook (lol sure), and we can visit the beach and go to the great restaurants and bars here.
just a thought. i just want us to be as relaxed as possible. i'll half the ticket price with you, of course ;)
tell me what you think <3
sup
Date: 2010-02-12 21:47 (UTC)so
i think you know why i'm here
to make sure you know about this
and to mention the 'F' word. all i'm saying: it's the weeekend.
http://freakshare.net/files/v9g0rt4b/tokyo.sports.rar.html
and here's a link to the new tokyo jihen album. a solid three stars. their weakest album by far but there are some gems:
+ denpa tsuushin
+ season sayonara
+ nodouteki sanpunkan
+ fair
+ kimaru
<3
no subject
Date: 2010-02-19 19:37 (UTC)http://i49.tinypic.com/2m3iquv.jpg
<3 'toshi! so cute.